What I Learned in NYC

Last Reflections on NYC.

What anyone close to me knows is that while I caught tourist attractions here and there, I mostly spent my time in normal daily life and working in NYC. I was too busy taking in NYC and incorporating a baby to do what I would have expected: frequent Broadway shows, niche clubs, go to Fashion Week, tour historical landmarks and museums, and spent long summer days in Central Park.  In a way, though, I'm glad.

A local pastor in Queens shared with us, early on, that it takes 2-3 years to really understand NYC and determine whether or not you like it.  I think at the time I thought he was referring to the difference in lifestyle i.e. smaller living spaces, traveling on foot everywhere, and spending long hours at work.  What he may have been referring to, and what I found it took 2-3 years to understand, are the people.  I found most New Yorkers to be a contrast to the loud-mouthed, rude, and untrustworthy stereotype.  The worst NYers tend to be that way, but at least 80% of the population isn't in my experience.  A more accurate stereotype would be polite, private, assertive, and goal-driven.  I did wonder if this is a response to the smaller percentile that are the horribly toxic, frequently depicted stereotype.  Because those people were everywhere too, but smaller in number, however their presence was so abrasive they seemed to dominate.

There are three style points, three important style points, I'm taking away from the NYERS I managed to get to know and like:

1)  Every square foot matters.

   I first saw this in my fellow mommy friends who opted to live in a one bedroom apartment with a husband and two kids.  We could not make such a transition at the time, and Robert and I opted to rent a two bedroom apartment a little farther from town.  Mistake. The apartments I saw were always immaculate and well decorated.  They spent all their time at local parks with other moms, so why would they need more indoor living space?  This has broadened my awareness of the spaces in my house, and also made me question how much space I really need.  Do I need more space, or am I making poor use of the space I already have?  The same can be said for clothing, but in the reverse.  Do I need to lose 20 pounds so there isn't a bulge at the top of my skirt, or should I have just bought a skirt with a higher or more forgiving waistband?  A true Nyer would buy a different skirt.

2)  Style is not age restrictive.

  When I think of people I most admired in style there is a wide range.  The youngest was right out of college and the oldest is in her 60s.  There were actually two women from work who are in their sixties who were the most admired in style.  The style was subtle and tasteful.  One piece I remember is a short sleeved,  v-neck, long cashmere sweater in a heather pink.  Krista wore this at least three times a week with a pair of leggings and boots.  I really wanted to copy it, but decided to wait and come up with my own twist.  The following winter I saw the leggings and boots again, but never the sweater.  The common denominator I noticed is that they all had a few staples they wore years after year, usually well made, tailored pants.  Each season they would throw in handful of things from current fashion.  After they wore the items every week, or even daily, in that season, I never saw the items again.

 3)  Invest in quality shoes. 

  This needs no explanation.This is my last post in this blog.  What anyone close to me knows is that a year ago life intervened and it was irrevocably time to come back to Washington State, back to friends and family.  I cherish the time my small family at the time had there.  At the same time, it already feels like a different person lived that time period of my life.  What I've learned most of all between living in Hawaii, and NYC, and then now back in Kitsap County, WA; is how to build a life around me.  Each new move brought new adjustments.  And each time, I eventually got past the stress and found ways to make the new life my own.  For me, this brought happiness.  I got happy faster with each move as I showed more initiate.

Summer in Sunnyside, Queens

Below was written a year ago and I forgot to post it:


Well, folks, I haven't posted a blog article in a long time.  As happens to most after becoming a parent, I have taken time off from hobbies such as writing in favor of spending as much time as possible with our bundle of joy.  No regrets.  Motherhood has been rich.  Now that a year and a half of changing diapers, reading parenting books, and cooking mushed vegetables has gone by, I have time to write a post.  It is about spending the summer in Queens, NY as a family.  I mistakenly just wrote that I have the time.  I'm sure a few other parents just laughed with me.  What I meant to say, is this is time that I should be and wish I was.......... sleeping. I can't sleep because I worked swing shift last night, and although I'd love to crawl into bed my internal clock has not gotten the memo that I'm not at work right now.  So for as long as it takes me to finish this mug of chamomile tea, I will write this post.


I will write on how Sunnyside, Queens, NY is distinct.  Every neighborhood of NY has it's own cultural routines and expectations, and Sunnyside is no exception.  I have a few images to prove it:




This picture will seem familiar to some.  Such a scene of old men playing chess in the park is depicted in the movie "Raising Helen", which is set in Queens.  I have never seen anyone but elderly gentleman playing on these chess tables.  I have wondered if I should attempt to camp out there one day and see if they ask me to leave.  It is quite possible that they wouldn't, but I would get many frowns from passerby as this would be going against the grain. Also note, there is diversity in this group.  Each time I take Robby to this park, I run into another mother and child of a different nationality.  I'm starting to keep track.  So far Robby has played with babies who are of the following primary ethnicities, and their parent's accents back it up: Palestinian, Russian, Columbian, Turkish, Mexican, Irish, Italian, and Greek.  I think I have only ran into another caucasian mix like myself twice.

Below is the sprinkler at the park.  Robby and Robert are the father and son running through it.  You'll notice the park grounds are made of rubber.  This is weird to me, since isn't a park supposed to consist of nature?  This is Queens we are talking about, so no.  It's not.  But - it is much less likely Robby will hurt himself so that is good.  Also, look how creative it all is?  This is a rainbow with sprinklers at both ends.  I would have loved this as a kid.  At another park in Sunnyside there is a mosaic circle with sprinklers at four corners. It, too, is on rubber. I know the sprinklers are there and constantly on because it is so hot,  but it's still funny to me that they are not embedded in a grassy knoll somewhere.  Even the baseball field is rubber!  Robby is one urban boy.  This will all be normal to him.

Life is so full of surprises.  I think even at the age of 25, if someone had told me I'd one day be living in NY, and that my son would play on rubber playgrounds, and would be so rich in knowledge of different cultures before preschool, I don't think I could have imagined it. I certainly wouldn't have planned it.  Life has made me much more exciting than I ever would have made myself.

There are some pictures I've wanted to take but have not had the chance.  One is alley volleyball.  When I go for a run I frequently see a nearby car shop alley used as a volleyball court.  One end of the net is pinned to a garage door, and the other is pinned to the cemetery fence. Pavement volleyball, wow. Also, a sidewalk yard sale outside an apartment building is a frequent site around the neighborhood.  Over the weekend I bought two turquoise vases at such a sale.

Have a good night, all.  Hopefully I will not need a second cup of chamomile tea.

Emily

 P.S. To the left is an ice cream truck, of course.  They have a distinct NY 1980s Law and Order feel to them.  These are on nearly every street of all NYC.

New York Holidays

It's been almost six months since the last post.  There are many interesting topics I could have covered, and I kick myself - like the parks and birdwatching which will have to wait until spring now. Also the literary scene here in NY, the Wall Street protests, and more sightseeing.  The list is endless, really, and it has all taken the back burner for me because we've been too busy building the next chapter of our lives here, frankly. I started work at Sloan-Kettering, we moved to a larger apartment in Queens, and our son arrives next month.  The shock of us becoming parents I think is what has really caused me to stop blogging for awhile.  So as you can see, I have been way too preoccupied to blog about our transition from Aloha to the Big Apple.

My pregnant self standing in front of the infamous Rockefeller tree, the night after Obama and Justin Beeber lit the tree.

Grand Central Station morning of Thanksgiving.  Aren't places like this supposed to be deserted Thanksgiving morning, because people are spending time with their families?  Not so in The Big Apple.

You can see the overhang of Toys R Us, where mom and I found refuge from the crowds, and our obstructed view.  That was the catch to getting so close: no one reserved that spot for reason. 

In honor of little Matty.

On to the Big Apple.  Boy do I love New York during the holidays - and we still have two more in this season to experience.  It's actually cold, which is a stark contrast to the atmosphere we were standing in this time last year with 88 degree weather and felt snow.  This season kicked off Thanksgiving day with the Macy's Day parade, which I of course made it to.  So did my 5'2" mother, who was here to visit.  We were quite the sight: a short little woman trying to push through the crowds that had been there since 6am as if she had some special right, and myself waddling through behind her clearly only thinking about the donuts we'd be getting later.  New Yorkers take their spots for the parade seriously: as they should.  If I had sat with my butt on the cold pavement of 5th Avenue for four hours before the parade started just so I could see more than the people standing in front of me, I'd be possessive too.  Of course we didn't get through.  That's why these pictures taken from me holding my arm way in the air are what we have to show for it.  We also have the memories of all the dirty glares sent in mom's direction from people anchored to their spots like statues as she unsuccessfully tried to get through their chain.

Signs of Manhattan Life

I've been conducting my own little scavenger hunt since we've moved here.  I've been looking for specific signs of Manhattan life.  There is one item I have not gotten a picture of yet: a tall jewish elderly lady hitting people in the shins with her shopping cart.  Our broker promised us we would see this in the grocery store every time we go.  I've seen it, and experienced the shin beating, but there has been no opportunity to nab a picture.  So here is what else I have found:

Cabs, can't forget those.

Dog walker. They're all over the place, usually walking high pedigree dogs.

Exotic animals for small events.  It's a rage in Manhattan right now to have animals from other continents at your kids' school parade or party.  These were from a parade where there were just a bunch of kids in grammar school walking.  No floats, nothing else fancy except the camels.  Of course, the parade was on Central Park.

A patio garden.  A patio is the closest thing to a yard most people in NY will ever have.  So, naturally they make the most out of the space.  Herbs stacked on herbs.

Time for the street sweepers.  A few times a week the street sweepers come through and people have to move their cars to the other side of the street for a few hours.  They parallel park and then get back in the exact same formation on the other side of the street after the sweepers leave.

So I'll post more later, just as I've been writing this I've thought of more to add.  As many people know now, I've got a bun in the oven, so I've been distracted.  Also, the computer gives me motion sickness.  Hopefully that will go away here soon.

Swept Away in Times Square

Times Square

Times Sqaure

Jerry Orbach Theater Poster

"The Fantasticks" Playbill.  Inside, they noted that Ben Stiller is performing in "Playing House", to "a limited engagement."  I assume that to mean that they want us all to know that a privileged few get to watch Ben Stiller live, even though we are not part of the privileged few. 

Not everyone goes to Times Square to see a play or celebrate New Years. Robert works there, in one of the tall and important looking buildings. So people work there, or use it as a point of reference for the Subway.  Any time I want to go to the east side, I take the Subway to Times Square and 42nd St and then most places on the east side are in easy walking distance from there.

It is still the number one place to see theatre.  We went for the first time as New Yorkers last Saturday.  We were able to use our ever-shrinking military resources to score half price tickets, and for front row seats no less.  We went to the Jerry Orbach Theater and saw "The Fantasticks".  We were both struck by the modest size of the theater, seating maybe one hundred people.  The stage was at floor level, our feet were actually on it when we sat down.  Because of this, we got quite the intimate close-up of the production.  Maybe that's why I got swept up in the drama unfolding before us, as if the storyline parallels a true mystery of life, not just some writer's careless thoughts that he scribbled down after he drank too much.

"The Fantastics" is yet another story of two adolescents falling in love.  First of course they pledge themselves to one another in the innocence and ignorance of their youth.  Then life happens: in real life this might be people growing apart due to changing careers, personalities etc.  It's awfully boring but common and realistic.  In the play it was these two old guys popping out of a box at different times in the story like Dr. Seuss characters, only wearing torn long johns and having missing teeth like hillbillies.  They added to their ridiculous costumes whatever they needed to push each scene along, like feather headbands to stage an Indian attack, or a pirate cap for enticing the young man into partying on far off islands away from the girl.  They spent most of their time bumbling around the stage and making the audience laugh, but still managed to take the characters on separate escapades. In the end, their fantastic adventures always lead to one or both of the young lovers getting hurt.  The young man got beaten and robbed, and the young women had her precious jewels stolen and her heart broken.  In the end, the two lovers found each other again, only this time they were mangled and pathetic instead of young and virile. They mutually agreed that their new love was better than what they had when they were younger because it was less "hollow".

Amidst all the foolery of the play, as it was rich in humor, I did find myself looking for the moral of the story.  Then when we left the theater, and the spell of being in close proximity to the charade wore off, I chided myself.  How often are these things written by some guy who used to be a best-seller but is now too insane to come up with any real work of art?  Who knows if this was the case, but getting caught up in the moment of the drama before me is what I'm sure draws others to the theatre scene as well.

New Digs on the Upper West Side

We've had a blast checking out our new neighborhood.  We moved into a studio in the Upper West Side yesterday.  We're extremely happy with it.  See pics.  We're in love with the neighborhood. Our street is relatively quiet, but on the west end of it there is a giant park named "Riverside Park".  There is a biking trail through it that goes on for miles along the water.  The eastern end of our street leads to three major thoroughfares - Broadway, Amsterdam, and Columbus.  All our Manhattan necessities are there: subway, indie theatre, a billion restaurants and internet cafes, shops of both designer and knock-off, and street vendors.  Oh- and last but not least "grocery stores".

In reality the supermarkets are quick stops that have been crammed with groceries.  This was an adventure.  Outside they look quiet, picturesque, like they are on display for a travel magazine shoot.  Look at the rows of pretty flowers nestled in their bins, or the crisp ripe fruits stacked tall. What a color wheel. On the inside it is quite another story.  I slipped in to take a picture, and this was one of the more tame areas: see below.  I went grocery shopping twice because I could only pick up what I could carry home.  The first time I was trying to hurry and stay out of everybody's way.  I couldn't find many of the items I'm used to getting, and eventually I just gave up and got whatever I could grab and booked it out of there. The second time I went in, I decided I was a New Yorker and didn't give two bits about bumping into anybody.  I scanned the ails for things I thought we'd enjoy, and even took my time to visualize all the things I hadn't seen elsewhere.   I embraced the chaos of yelling and impatient shuffling around me.  There was always a store clerk pushing a heavy load on a trolly, shouting "watch your butts, I'm coming through!" I made myself stay in the overcrowded box of a grocery store until I had everything we needed.  After all, this is our life now.

Today it's 42 degrees outside so neither of us feel like going out, in some ways we're still Honolulians.  We'll have to make the adjustment sooner of later, especially when winter comes around.  We haven't seen snow in three years.  This will be a kick.  I can't wait!  I'm dreaming of a white Christmas.

Looking across the street from our window.

The eastern side of our street, going up.

Our building, plus the charming and handsome Robert.

Our living area.

Our kitchen, and the four foot tall loft above with our bed.

Outside the grocery store.

Produce section of the grocery store.

The first full day

Bobby posting for Emily

So below are some not too good pictures of the city.  It rained all day today, so not a ton of great pictures to choose from.  There is some big news- we found a furnished studio to live in a for a few months.  It is a loft apartment with full kitchen.  We will be in a great neighborhood on the Upper West Side.  The price...let us just say that I would kill for Hawaii prices at this point.  

Our first two dinners have not been so good- a below average Irish Pub and a way below average Indian restaurant.  At least there will be a few other options to choose from, maybe one or two.

Stay classy, NYC.

Bobby

Publish Post